We are now one week away from a new school year at WRSM. It feels like we were just in class two weeks ago. Oh, right. We were, but I'm totally fine with that! It was a dang good quarter; challenging, but full of growth and so much joy, as you are about to read.
Honestly, I'm glad life worked out the way it did so I could be in classes with both groups. The different levels and personalities made those ten weeks all the more enjoyable. I got to know people I had only seen in passing, and the first year group really became a family to me. I can't wait to see how things unfold when we get mixed up together in the upcoming classes.
So, without further ado, a selection of quotes from the summer of 2016. (seriously.... there are so many more! It was a good quarter.)
New Testament Survey
Pastor Jack Walter (PJW): “Don’t drink whiskey in class!
At least pass it around!” (on a 5 hour energy shot)
PJW: “That’s how I think people’s minds work sometimes…
like jello running all over the place.”
PJW: “What was his first name? Graham? That was here last
week?”
Steph: “Cliff.”
PJW: “Thank you. That name doesn’t stick. Graham does. I
like graham crackers.”
Jacque: “There’s a Polycarp too?”
Samuel: “Is that like a bunch of fish?”
PJW: “How’d we get off on that tangent? Oh! Listening!”
Inspired speech
Heather Eschenbaum (HE): “God created you with a mouth,
but not to complain.”
HE: “If I don’t look like an influence, why would I be
given the chance to influence.”
HE: “As your spirit goes down, so does your voice.”
HE: “Whatever you want in life, you have to pursue it
strong.”
HE: “Your internal is eternal.”
HE: “Intellect doesn’t give you compassion.”
HE: “Don’t run from the hardship. Pray through the
hardship.”
HE: “We shouldn’t have to be pulled along by our apathy.”
HE: “To have compassion, go to war.”
HE: “I didn’t want to write it. I should’ve called
Stephanie!”
HE: “Here’s this spiritual giant and I’m a pipsqueak in
Jesus.”
HE: “Don’t ever call it a car. It’s a Jeep. If you call
it a car, a kitten dies.”
HE: “Create something that will last.”
HE: “Guess what! Everyone mentors you, even your
enemies.”
HE: “If you’re going to have a testimony, let it be
wild.”
HE: “If you want people to be changed by your talk, you
have to relive it and feel it.”
Samuel: “He goes and builds the wall. Wow. That’s
summarizing the heck out of it.”
HE: “Extra credit to whoever makes Darren cry!”
HE: “And then you start to sound like a turkey.”
Christian (guest): “Give me something good.”
HE: “Well, it’s the word of God, so…..”
Ryan: “I pray that you let your A-ness shine through.”
Santesa: “That’s not gonna work.”
HE: “I’ve never heard anyone ruin a prayer before.”
HE: “If Florence gets them all, you are not a royal
priesthood!”
HE: “You don’t have to spell it right to be it.”
HE: “Trash talk IS Ryan’s love
language.”
Samuel: “I write humble the
best.”
HE: “You might have to fight Ryan for that.”
HE: “You might have to fight Ryan for that.”
Samuel: “Planet shakers!”
HE: “Surely that’s in the Bible
somewhere.”
HE: “You know who was the first
farmer?”
Ryan: “Adam!”
HE: “THE LORD!”
HE: “But I have the amplified,
so it amplifies.”
HE: “If you are going to judge
others, you are taking away your opportunity to help them.”
HE: “Transition brings out the
best and worst in you.”
HE: “The spiritual realm is
stolen so much more because the enemy comes to steal it.”
HE: “If you’re on a slippery
slope, you’re going to slip.”
HE: “Every day you have a
conversation with the enemy, you are eating of the fruit.”
HE: “I don’t sound like Hunter,
but I pray I sound like Whitney Houston. When Whitney Houston passed, I prayed
for her anointing.”
Samuel: “Then we walk in, this
rowdy bunch, being all, you know,
normal.”
HE: “They have the spirit of
God, but they don’t trust it.” MOST CONVICTING THING EVER!
Samuel: “He’s replacing your
fear with fierce love.”
Steph: “Your sweetness is a
strength.”
HE: “Why am I eating barn in a
blanket?!”
Samuel: “I’m lost. Is there a
type L for lost?”
Samuel: (Chews gum into
microphone) “How awesome does that sound?”
Steph: “Sounds like you’re going
to get punched.”
Samuel: “Punched?! What type is
that?”
HE: (laughing) “She’s so much
smaller than you and she’s going to punch you!”
Prayer: Adoration and
proclamation
Ben Woodward (BW): “War doesn’t
wait for you to be ready.”
BW: “We are sons and daughters
of the living God and the only time the enemy has authority over us is when we
give it to him.”
BW: “If I said, ‘Can God
provide finances in a time of need?”
Class: “Yes.”
BW: “But if I said, ‘Can God do
it for you in your circumstance right now?”
Class: “Yes.”
BW: “Right. We’ll you’re all a
bunch of charismatics.”
BW: “Unbelief is not a petty
issue. It is a rampant disease. It’s out of control in the body of Christ and
that has to change.”
BW: “The ability to work with
God comes from us.”
BW: “The enemy knows if you
believe the lie, you’ll perpetuate the sin on your own.”
Jill Koppang: “I’m going to
write on the board because I’m a teacher and I know how to do that.”
Jill Koppang: “We should be
praying things that are the passion of our heart.”
BW: “Adoration prayer allows us to see with different
perspective.”
BW: “God is not after half-hearted lovers.”
BW: “Every slight misstep is an opportunity to discover
God.”
BW: “God’s not going to rescue you out of the situation.
He’ll empower you to endure it.”
BW: “I think, sometimes, we as a human race, that’s kinda
how we operate with the Lord, is where we’re jamming our head into the armhole
of our shirt.”
BW: “We strive to show our self-worth through our
independence.”
BW: “Let’s be real. I’m a glorified karaoke singer.”
BW: “When you sow, you don’t reap one to one. You reap
100 to one. That’s the point.”
BW: “What you stare into is what you become like.”
BW: “A bi-product is, when we understand Him, we
understand ourselves.”
BW: “God doesn’t answer prayer. He answers people.”
Who We Are In Christ
Pastor Eric Thomason (PET): “What God does in the
spiritual realm dictates what happens in the natural realm.”
PET: “If you’re an over thinker, you’ll over shoot the
simplicity of God.”
PET: “With God, the journey is everything.”
PET: “No matter how much you know about God, it’s not the
same as knowing God.”
PET: “When you make God more comfortable, you
automatically get more comfortable.”
PET: “You wanna know what true arrogance is? It’s you
giving yourself the right to say who you are against what God has said.”
Santesa: “Standing behind [your weakness], you become
weakened behind it.”
PET: “Whatever dominates our minds will eventually come
out.”
PET: “It’s the church’s authority to say what will happen
on this earth.”
BW: “The most painful lesson we can learn is God is not
in a hurry.”
End Times Perspectives
Pastor Aaron Lage (PAL): “He’s the guy who talked about
escalators and they always say, ‘sorry, temporarily out of order’ when
they should say, ‘sorry, temporarily
stairs’ like they’re never really our of order.”
Esther: “Oh, I was thinking elevator not escalator.”
(PAL almost spews water.)
Caila: “Can you say that again then?”
(Pastor Aaron doubles over trying not to choke on water.)
PAL: “I really almost choked on my water.”
PAL: “The sad thing is, Steph’s going to watch this
later. She’ll be able to rewind and really quote it.”
Esther: “You’ll just have to cut it and she won’t be able
to.”
PAL: “This video gets found on whatever is left of the
internet a millennium from now. They’ve got to figure out what a butt dial is.
Is it a button you push with your butt? And why is it so funny for people?”
Erica: “If you’re not careful, someone will actually make
a button you dial with your butt.”
Caila: “I ate ALL the animals!”
PAL: “Why is that funny?”
Dylan: “I pictured him riding a hippo.”
PAL: “I thought you were going to say something about
hungry hungry hippos.”
PAL: “You should’ve heard of Packer.”
Erica: “Not unless it was the Green Bay Packers.”
PAL: “Christianity without churchianity decapitates Jesus
from His body.”
PAL: “If you’re not letting the Bible shape your view,
the world is shaping it.”
PAL: “Guess what. I’m not watching my horoscope for when
Jesus will return!”
PAL: “I’m playing dev… not devil’s advocate. I’m playing
angel’s advocate.”
PAL: “God works through process.”
PAL: “To a certain degree, God wants it to affect your
faith. That’s why it’s a trial of your faith.”
PAL: “My goal in here isn’t to answer every question; it’s
to create more.”
PAL: “Humor is so much fun.”
Isaac: “By definition.”
Isaac: “By definition.”
PAL: “Sometimes it doesn’t translate between cultures.”
Luke: “Or IQs.”
Luke: “Or IQs.”
Caila: “Huh?”
PAL: “You may be completely right, but you need to value
relationship over your right-ness.”
PAL: “Rapture jokes are fun. Sometimes I get caught up in
them.”
Isaac: “Sometimes they go over my head.”
Isaac: “Sometimes they go over my head.”
Kaitlynn: “Was that a joke?”
(talking about 1 Corinthians 13:8)
PAL: “But go down a little and knowledge wouldn’t be for
today, which is why it’s so hard to argue with them! It’s the same sentence!
Mic drop!”
PAL: “He’s not saying God owns the cattle on a literal
thousand hills. The rest are the devil’s.”
PAL: “A stay-at-home mom has a greater ability to raise
disciples than a man in the workplace, and guess what, she’s given all
authority.”
PAL: “What if out first response is to walk in ALL
AUTHORITY?”
PAL: “There are more churches in America than McDonald’s”
Kaitlynn: “Woah!”
PAL: “America might have more denominations than McDonald’s. There are technically more Subways than McDonald’s, but that’s a whole different story.”
PAL: “America might have more denominations than McDonald’s. There are technically more Subways than McDonald’s, but that’s a whole different story.”
Luke: “We could turn all the Walmart’s into churches.
Intercom.”
PAL: “Because that’s great sound quality.”
PAL: “The only time the enemy has power is when we
believe the lie.”
PAL: “You view is an interpretive process. My view is an
interpretive process. The Mormons are just on crack.”
Esther: “So, you’re walking with a friend and all of the
sudden, you walk through a wall and they don’t?”
Thora: “I wasn’t a Southern Baptist. I was a first,
regular Baptist.”
PAL: “Welcome to the 90’s, which is just the leftovers of
the 80’s.”
PAL: “Sin is not God’s kryptonite.”
Erica: “It’s a prepositional phrase. It starts with ‘to.’
Homeschooled.”
Caila: “Hashtag.”
PAL: “You have a defeated foe and everything he is
whispering, he is whispering through a jail cell.”
Luke (praying over the test the whole class forgot
about): “Let us reap what we did not sow.”
PAL: “What happens if there is a third world war?”
Luke: Well, back to the rapture idea.”
Luke: Well, back to the rapture idea.”
PAL: “Bert and Ernie don’t count.”
Luke: “But the Count counts.”
Luke: “But the Count counts.”
PAL: *laughs like the Count*
Caila: “Is Gentry the good guy or bad guy in the book?”
PAL: “The point of being rescued is to rescue someone
else.”
PAL: “Did anyone name any more post millennialists?”
Luke: “Jesus, Paul and John.”
Esther: “What about Winston Churchill and General George
Patton? They were literally the only two people I could think of.”
PAL: “Why do you think the term ‘millennium’ is confusing
to people?”
Esther: “It sounds like a spaceship.”
PAL: “With running jokes, you need a ‘too far’ police.”
Hunter: “Rose will volunteer.”
Rose: “I volunteer! Just always stop.”
Isaac: “I don’t feel like he made any concrete arguments.”
PAL: “So, you prefer cement arguments?”
Erica: “That’s why they don’t fit as pre mil is because
they don’t fit.”
PAL: “I’m going to go ahead and accuse you of circular
reasoning.”
Kaitlynn: “The taste [of prunes] isn’t bad, they just
make me think of old people.”
PAL: “This is the problem with calling another view dumb;
someone was smart enough to write something about it that is above you.”
PAL: “Most people live in an addition/subtraction model,
but God wants us to live in a multiplication model and that’s where it becomes
exponential.”
PAL: “Do you always have to have a carrot dangled in
front of you to do the right thing?”
Kaitlynn (quietly): “But I don’t like carrots.”
Kaitlynn (quietly): “But I don’t like carrots.”
PAL: “Is that why you don’t like me?”
Kaitlynn: “That’s not true!”
PAL: “Ignorant people cannot accuse a joke of being bad.”
Caila: “Ironsides… That’s the transformer, right?”
PAL: “What’s the most significant difference between post
mil and pre mil views?”
Dylan: “Common sense.”
Erica: “He really wrote that down!” [on the test
Erica: “He really wrote that down!” [on the test
PAL: “When you don’t have a value for something, you don’t
see it.”
PAL: “Scripture drop.”
PAL: “Lord, thank you for the joy in this class. Thank
you that we can laugh and joke at other people’s expense, including my own
sometimes.”
