Me: "Yup."
Supervisor: "Like, insane. You know that right?"
Me: "Sure."
I'd like to say it was a one time conversation, but, alas, it's not an unusual thing to hear. It generally follows questions about when I sleep or what my schedule is like. The answers are rarely and jam packed. Working a full and part time job, going to ministry school full time, being invested in various side gigs, and staying connected in a revived church mean I don't have much time to myself. Somehow, that's viewed as unusual.
But, it really shouldn't surprise anyone. There is the stereotype that millennials are spoiled and have no work ethic, but the numbers don't fully support that theory. Yes, there are plenty of entitled brats out there, but this generation is also hustling more. There are several studies out there showing that millennials are expecting to work more hours, are willing to spend more time on the clock, and are actually putting that to practice both while they are in school and once they reach management positions. I've talked to so many people my age who aren't interested in pursuing relationships because they are focused on their career. Being successful seems to be one of the most important things to my generation.
Maybe I'm just not in the right circles, but I don't hear people questioning the lack of sleep and busy schedules of people working multiple jobs or college students working to keep food on the table while trying to stay ahead of tuition. It definitely didn't happen when I was earning my first two Bachelor's degrees or when I worked two jobs just to pay the bills.
The judgement started when I went back to school for ministry.
The resistance really is not about the schedule. It's a lack of value on the Kingdom's movement. Encouragement doesn't flow into something that isn't understood as worthwhile.
It's kind of amusing how different groups of people respond. My friends who live a revival life are generally supportive, telling me to stay focused and get rest whenever I can People who aren't a part of a church call me crazy and tell me to give something up. My neighbor went so far as to call the apartment office because she thought I was dead after not seeing me for a week. If I'm honest, I was avoiding her. She's a nice lady, but a bit nosy and bossy. She likes to lecture about doing too much and how I should leave WRC, and I just don't have time for that kind of negativity.
During one of the lectures, I started to walk away when she said something about Jesus would want me to rest. I turned around, looked her straight in the eye and said, "'I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. [Philippians 4:13]' God wouldn't have opened these doors for me if He wasn't going to provide the ability to do it." Shocked, she said I might have a point and went back to her place.
I truly believe in that statement. Over the past year, I've been thinking about what lies ahead in my future and what I want to do with my life. I haven't been able to narrow it down to anything specific, other than making an impact. A few months back, God opened the door to starting small with coaching some 6th graders in volleyball. The door got a little bit bigger when I was asked to be a part of the Kids Ablaze team. Now, we are getting a glimpse of how widespread that could reach, and it is humbling and overwhelming to think about. God is beyond good and always faithful to fulfill His promises.
The Kingdom just takes a little work on our part.
Even when it seems like we are off the rails and beyond the reach of His plans, He can still work through us. Lisa Bevere posted on Facebook saying, "If you think you've blown God's plan for your life, rest in this. You, my beautiful friend, are not that powerful." Did you hear that mic drop? Another quote from Bevere that's been on my mind a lot lately is "What if the reason you don't know what you're called to do is that you are called to do something no one has ever done before?"
My life is an example of both of those statements right now. Despite all the ways I've screwed up, I'm still where God wants me to be. He's going to use my story to show His character [2 Corinthians 12:9-10]. My journey through ministry school has been far from the usual, but the realization that graduating on time is still a possibility just blows me away. Seeing how a couple other things are lining up for a year from now gives me chills every time I get to think or talk about it. I can see the timeline, but God isn't showing me all the details just yet. A few people asked me what my next step is, and all I can say is this: I don't know what it will be, but I know it's amazing beyond anything I could dream up on my own. I'm not going to worry now because that is next year's problem. Really, it's not even a problem. I know God is writing my story in His perfect timing. I have nothing to worry about. I just have to work through the tasks He is giving me now and be ready to say yes when He asks. That door will swing open on its own at the right moment, and I couldn't be more excited.
This next year is going to be an intense challenge and I'm going to be quite tired from time to time. If you catch me in one of those moments, please, do not tell me to take a break or give up. Don't let differences in our roles and training turn into judgments or division because we are all part of the same, set apart body. Instead, remind me that what is waiting at the finish line will be worth it [Jeremiah 29:11]. Remind me of where my strength comes from [Isaiah 40:29-31]. Remind me of these lyrics: "Unstoppable God/ Let Your glory go on and on/ Impossible things/ In Your name they shall be done."
Some may see my plans for the next year as impossible. I see it as training and an equipping for the next step. Since high school, I've had the mentality of "tell me I can't and I'll show you I can." (I even wrote something along those lines on a ceiling tile in a K-State building.) This is not a philosophy I plan to give up any time soon, especially since my victories now reflect God's strength, goodness, faithfulness, and purpose on this earth. Through Him alone, I'm ready and excited to conquer whatever challenges are ahead.
